...for abbu :(

daddy, are you okay?
look, dad, we got the same hair
daddy it's my bday
all i wanna say


you're so far away
you're so far away
that's okay, it's okay,
i'm okay


you're so far away
won't you come home won't you stay?
please stay please stay
won't you come home won't you stay?
one day, just one day
- coldplay (daddy)


2nd dec 2006 (13 years)

...oh coldplay :)

...yet again you took my heart away :)

.live from jordan.

...one woman many faces :)

"these days you seem less like my wife and more like a doted daughter and a spoilt sister"
-biker

(: london feels like home 'now' :)

...boom boom :)

in the midst of reading this
(the biker pre-ordered this for me, got published on 13th june 2019, he bloody well knows how to keep his girl happy, keeper!)

some stories need to shared :)

thoda sa main khafa ho gaya apne aap se,
thoda sa tujhpe bhi bewajah hi malaal aaye
---bekhayali, irshad kamil

...feed the soul :)

katra katra neki (collect every ounce of your goodness)

jod ke aisi naymat bhar (make it into a treasure of blessings)
jo har raza ko pura kaede (it will fulfill all your wishes)
woh har nakdi se upar (and holds a regard higher than anything else)
ek reza, do reza, teen reza, chahar (one wish, two wishes, three wishes, four)
jo bakshe sunnat (when  they come  together to bless)
mehul-e-bahaar (a gamut of reverence pours)

(: رمضان كريم :)

mottled dawn - saadat hasan manto

tim cook: the genius who took apple to the next level - leander kahney

...Q1'2019

bad blood: secret and lies in a silicon valley startup - john carreyrou
little fires everywhere - celeste ng
good to great : why some companies make the leap and others don't - jim Collins

now reading
a little life - hanya yanagihara :)

in other news
biker's phone was stolen yesterday (literally from under his nose, no panic, he bought another!)
and its zuzu's first bday today :)


"no matter how many prayers you have missed,
don't miss the next one"
- and then life happens :)

...the original gullyboy :)

after a recent career progression news, spate of congratulatory emails, texts, pings etc. made way to my inbox... but the only one that i love and which matters the most is from chotu ;)

(:love:)

...oh boy!

i only asked for an innocuous gift for our annual pilgrimage,

the comment is totally unwarranted, but helps ;)

did i not tell you, we don't do normal!

...live like there’s no tomorrow, cos there isn’t one :)

...i smiled, i laughed, i lived

2019 so far - travel travel  travel :)
8 hours of non-stop flight with a pitstop at ammi's and back on the road for the next 6 hours
and into the mountains...bliss
in a town, moving at its own pace and  i understand what the biker means how the landscape changes 100kms from bombay
3 to 33 to 13 degrees of separation
on the road again
travelators are escalators with no ambition, cracked me up
biker talking to our lovely driver hemant bhai in fluent local language and me lost in translation
ammi re-christening alexa to aqsa, love jihad i say at another level!
oh yeah, was frisked, again! i love my name :)
second law of thermodynamics
simply no need to add an objective to a hobby just to make it sound fun
hugs from humsyuyuyuyuyuyyuzuzuzuzuzuhums
looking at old pix of mine and wondering as thin as i was then i was sure i was fat
now i’m fat but i think i’m thin (trust me i like this confidence better :)
on the road, runway, rail, rev'ed all the way
travel more, tomemyfreedom :)

(: love :)



just so i remember - 2019 so far
lucknow diaries - partha sarthi sen sharma
the fifth risk - michael lewis
heads you win - jeffrey archer
brief answers to big questions - stephen hawking

..read till i die - dec'2018 :)

factfulness - hans rosling
adventures in human being - gavin francis

"you are mad but you are magic"
...was told :)

its 23:20 here in london right now, the city awaits new year and i have just wrapped up work *i know boring, i am*
wish you all a very happy 2019 :)

...'book'kad - nov'2018 :)

elon musk - ashlee vance
the fran lebowitz reader - fran lebowitz
the end of money (the story of bitcoin, cryptocurrencies and  blockchain revolution) - new scientist


"now you know what you fighting for"
-rocky balboa (creed 2)

...live it :)

70s melody on radio, thunder and rain, steaming bowl of poha, adrak ki chai, p.g.wodehouse in my lap, london skyline in full view, biker's cardigan worn inside out, old batman socks with holes pulled up, another round of nap already planned ;)
...winter weekend morning done right :)

alhumdulillah :)

...'book'ed weekends - oct'2018 :)

sons of thunder: writing from the fast lane: a motorcycling anthology -  neil bradford
an artist from the floating world - kazuo ishiguro
split: a life - taslima nasreen


"i guess they were always like that underneath, just needed the rules to change, for no one to intervene"
- whitebear (2.02) black mirror

...to men :)

i realise how difficult it is turning out to talk for men and not sound anti-feminist at the same time, very difficult, trust me it’s a task! however at the risk of being judged i love to defend men (or women! aarghhhh…i am going to leave political correctness behind for the time being). i think it’s the right thing to do when i am blessed with such an incredible set of men in my life (alhumdulillah): being doted by a father who loved his daughter more than his sons by giving her more freedom and choices to make , i have literally grown up amongst boys (what with being the only sister of three brothers), most of my close friends have always been guys (not by design), for god’s sake i am a banker (the industry is driven on testosterone) working with the best in the industry, i teach a class full of boisterous young men (and super intelligent), a male partner who makes it beautiful for both of us so effortlessly and believe me these ‘set of gents’ are remarkably amazing :) (mashaAllah)

i don’t think it’s cool to talk about stuff  at the same time when everyone else is talking about it (why add to the chaos ;)) and anyway i have a theory, when ‘everyone’ is talking about it then surely there is a much bigger ‘agenda’ for ‘someone’ which ‘everyone’ is oblivious to – sorry i don’t want to be part of the circus, so i listen, i like to listen – i do and i think  all this generalization is simply not done – poor men, they have been at the receiving end a lot for a while now, so unfair!

all i say to you, don’t lose focus, the fight is against the person not the gender, what’s the big deal in either being a man or a woman (statistically, in all probability you will end up being one); one is as right and the other as wrong as one comes, keep it real; get offended by poverty, war, climate change, ethnic cleansing, greed, hungry child not by likes, comments, posts, hearsay, anecdote, hashtags!


..and for me, damn who wants equality when i know what priviledge feels like; courtesy: the brilliant men in life :)

its bade  bhaiyya's 44th bday today, one of the most favouritest man in my life :)

...magic in your hands - sept'18

an ordinary life: a memoir - nawazuddin siddiqui
21 lessons for the 21st century - yuval noah harari
the vegetarian - han kang
on palestine - noam chomsky and ilan pappe


"when the children were initially coming out of mosul, they had even forgotten how to play"
- evening standard, 20thsept2018 

...book thief - aug'18

such a long journey - rohinton mistry
the handmaid's tale - margaret atwood
home fire - kamila  shamsie
dog man: from the creator of captain underpants (dog man #1) - dav pilkey


'khwab tu hai pehla'
   - album laila majnu

...bibliobibuli - jul'18 :)

debriefing the president: the interrogation of saddam Hussein - john nixon
traders, guns and money: knowns and unknowns in the dazzling world of derivatives - satyajit das (re-read, last read in 2010)

"f.i.n.a.l.l.y." (alhumdulillah)

-biker (20th july 2018)

...my escape - jun'18

maps of the soul - ahmed fagih
a day in the life - anjum hasan

know you can't protect your riches if you never burn bridges
flipped pages
went places
made changes
-the seige:the drum

...happiness is :)

rushing to grab a coffee before cracking on and being told by the barista at pret

"your cup is way too cool, the coffee is on the house"

smiling all the way back only to find some delicious brownies left on my desk by an anonymous colleague :)

*thanks biker for the cup :)

...bros and prose - may '18

one indian girl - chetan bhagat (in two hours flat, i had a lonely 8 hr flight back!)
prisoners of geography - tim marshall
the one plus one - jojo moyes


haa.n dikha de ae tasawwar phir woh subha sham tu /
o imagination! bring back that period
dorh piche ki taraf ae gardish-e-eayyam tu /
o vicissitudes of time speed backwards
- ammi (quoting mohammed 'allama' iqbal while all we have now is memories of abbu)

...my therapy - apr ' 18

marrakech express - peter millar
the strange disappearance of a bollywood star - vaseem khan
Muhammed: the prophet of islam - prof. k.s. ramakrishna rao
Muhammed the greatest - ahmed deedat


"i get bored with baba, but its so much fun with phuppho"
- hums (my fav nephew;))

...fully book'ed - mar ' 2018 :)

the lives of others - neel mukherjee
gangsta granny - david walliams (yeah :))
weird lies - liars' league collection
a pale view of hills - kazua ishiguro


"she was yours to begin with. now, maybe, she's where she belongs"
-haruki murakami

...no shelf control - feb ' 2018 :)

the miniaturist - jessie burton
inshaAllah - alys einion

"abhi to kuchh kaha nahin
abhi to kuchh suna nahin
abhi na jaao chod kar ke dil abhi bhara nahin"


-sahir ludhianvi

...carpe librum - jan ' 2018

a fine balance - rohinton mistry
the bamboo stalk - saud alsanousi
the unusual billionaires - saurabh mukherjea


"why do you look so sad?"
"because you speak to me in words and i look at you with feelings"


-leo tolstoy

...just what i wanted:)

one of my favourite author on impostor syndrome, makes me smile :)


"Some years ago, I was lucky enough invited to a gathering of great and good people: artists and scientists, writers and discoverers of things.  And I felt that at any moment they would realise that I didn’t qualify to be there, among these people who had really done things.

On my second or third night there, I was standing at the back of the hall, while a musical entertainment happened, and I started talking to a very nice, polite, elderly gentleman about several things, including our shared first name*. And then he pointed to the hall of people, and said words to the effect of, “I just look at all these people, and I think, what the heck am I doing here? They’ve made amazing things. I just went where I was sent.”

And I said, “Yes. But you were the first man on the moon. I think that counts for something.”

And I felt a bit better. Because if Neil Armstrong felt like an imposter, maybe everyone did. Maybe there weren’t any grown-ups, only people who had worked hard and also got lucky and were slightly out of their depth, all of us doing the best job we could, which is all we can really hope for"

...these waves dont reach the shore :)

discovered a gem of a poet called dushyant kumar after watching masaan and was simply so impressed and proud of his works - i know its too late in the day now - but just came across some again yesterday - so random - just beautiful - like some forgotten memories ;)

...happiness is :)

excited to be at work on an early monday morning and to find this 'anonymous' gift on my desk ;)

yeah i am one of those annoying colleague addicted to her spinner ;)

...guilty as charged # 2

colleague (well meaning one) : so you stopped being friends?
me: uh huh
colleague : so abruptly, why?
me: cos i cant keep up
colleague : keep up what?
me: the pretence
colleague : ah!, so you stopped when it got inconvenient for YOU
me : hmmm...its one way to look at it
colleague (still meaning well) : no, its the ONLY way to look at it
me : k


...we never said goodbye ;)

...guilty as charged # 1

a discussion on socio-economic issues which spiraled into people getting personal and someone said "so your generation is making 8 to 10 times more money each month than your parents generation"
"huh-uh" i said
"so how does it make you feel"
"guilty"


...the emptiness inside you is all yours alone, a world inside you, who can say what's best until then - live on :)

...7 going on 70!

you helping to search my glasses and me your other pair of sock, long calls to people we love to talk to and handwritten letters sent through post, more motorbikes and some more wonderful rides, you reading me poetries and when you have finally dropped that clipped british accent which i find unbearably pretentious, those silly fights over my cooking and when you actually cook something, some sports, some theatre and a lot more long walks, weekdays like weekends, zero attempts to  murder each other (i doubt this one!) a home with lots of light, greens and just enough space...leaving the mainstream behind
 

it is foolish to believe that there are only three magical words, while there are so many more….between us, which is ours ;)

palkein jhapaktay hi,
din yeh nikal jaye

how do we celebrate these days…a celebration of partnership, affection, trust, tolerance, and patience (the order varies throughout the day)… by never ceasing the celebration :)

hitting it, not quitting it -  what an apt gift - shukriya dost ;)

…anniversaries like that!

...just so i can remember!

date: 15th march 2017
time: 6.15 p.m.
me and biker walking towards one of the high-street stores to pick up something,
three kids (20-22 years old, must be the sales staff) talking among themselves:

guy 1 : so where do really really want to be?
guy 2: yeah where do want to go? you really wish to go?
girl : hawaii!


the biker looks at me completely stunned and i turned to him smilingly and ask:

'what are the odds of this happening' :)

alhumdulillah!

...rush hour humour :)

finally braving to read through vikram seth's 1349 pages magnum opus (before the sequel hits the stand in 2017) and was just about to miss my stop, hurriedly standing up and pushing the book in, when an elderly gentleman sitting right opposite said:


"ah, u now have him in your bag"


*a suitable boy :)

...was said :(

"yeah, i agree, i don't fix anything,
i rather let it go..."
"...i disappear, i do that often"
"would you remember that i existed, just like this - standing next to you?"
"...no"
"you say 'no' too often, don't you?"
"...yeah, see you just got lucky"
"i am amazed how unconscious you are of your deformities!"
"...the real me is far far away"
"...i am already waving you goodbye in my head"
"hold on tight"
"...to what?"

...a different perspective!

(another random small talk)
at work
colleague: oh wow, your glasses are so cool, so cute - harry potter *giggle giggle*
me: lennon is more like it!

(i am so done with small talks, don't say anything if you don't have anything to, aaarghhhhh)

...so long :)

don't go looking out for ways to go short, go long!


finally, the biker understands what i do for a living!
thank you, the big short :)


*i don't blame the chap, which  guy wont when selena gomez explains ;)

...couldnt resist :)

xyz : so dilwale or bajirao?
me: star wars
:|

...one love :)

a guy at a very small retro italian cafe: spread the love sweetheart, spread the love!

me: no, love is a very limited resource, to give it to someone else you need to take it back from someone!

(how i just so very conveniently named the new love as 'else', it indeed is :))
...

...only way to keep me is to let me go!

(just after i helped a colleague (supposedly the closest to me at workplace) out of a complex pricing calculations)

colleague1 : you are a legend! you are a rockstar!

me: i know

colleague 2 : *kisses kisses kisses*

me: dissssss.....gusting!

(when colleague 1 was out on holidays)

colleague 2 : you missing colleague 1?

me: no! i don't miss anyone, not so easily!

colleague 3 (freshie): what! tsk tsk! *rolling eyes*

colleague 2 to 3: she is hardcore! you will see!! totally!!!

***
F1's whatsapp reads:
"happy friendship's day heroine"

my reply reads:
"you the only one who wished me *fake grief*
      but that does'nt prove anything *evil grin*"

***

boss reading out my appraisal feedback (i asked him to skip the goody goody bits, he knows the drill!)

"i also think khan could sometimes be a little more patient when explaining concepts to colleagues, they do not all share her ability to grasp an idea as quickly as her"

"oh..so you asking me not to be an asshole" (i truly enjoy messing with him, he is so proper, true brit)

"ahh..hmm...no...no...i dont mean that, i have to say something, you see :)"

"oh c'mon boss man cut the bull, lets talk numbers, bonus?"

 ***
the biker got me the coolest deck of cards ever, black, sleek, sharp & neat in a vintage tin box and that got me real excited

"arre yaar if only you knew how to play"

“kya karna hai seekh ke, haarna hi hai"

trust me i am not that easily embarrassed :)

...change is overrated!

the blue sky, green leaves, the tarmac road, the rough mountains, the blazing sun and the turquoise aquamarine lake and then i hate how the sunglasses changes the view

the oneness in the moment, the gesture, the feeling of humility, the nothingness at thousands of feet above ground and under sea, and then i hate the effort to capture it all in  a damn photograph to be instagrammed for the whole wide world

the smell of books, the yellow colour pages with watermarks showing the age, the stains of the coffee cup rings and the timeless bookmark gifted by a special friend and then i hate how the e-reader changes it all

the understanding, the fun, the moments, the togetherness, the time of our lives  and then i hate how you want to brand it all under the parenthesis of friendship

the life led, the struggles endured, the battles won, the success and the failure allusion, fame and recognition, being an inspiration and always inspired and then i hate it all when an autobiography is published for posterity sake

memories created, debates and arguments, moments lived, a phase in life and then i hate it how a ‘reunion day’ is created to recreate those days

the innocence of childhood, the faith and trust in humanity, love for all and the endless possibilities and then i hate how cynicism of the youth takes over

the love, the pain, the agony, the intimacy and then i hate the need for one to go ahead and describe the feelings in words

somethings in life should just be…as is :)

they call me old school, but old’s cool :)

all depending on which side of the cracked continuum you are on!!

...be :)

your kindness may be treated as your weakness, still be kind

your help to others may go unneeded and unnoticed, still be helpful

your silence and patience may make you appear diffident, still be patient 

if you are honest and frank, people may cheat you, still be honest

the good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow, do good always

because being good to people is a beautiful legacy to leave behind

because it is between you and Allah, it was never between you and them :) 

..true that :)

waiting for the biker at london bridge tube station at rush hour, the world passing by, i spilled some espresso macchiato on  my coat when i read

"she thinks she's a feminist but she's just bad-tempered"

(: you crack me up mr.kureishi when you speak my mind

and thats the reason you rule my book shelf :)

...so was i told :)

"while she was no radical, no natural breaker of rules, no seeker of the bold statement, she was in her own serene way uncaring of convention and other's opinions”

- tarun j. tejpal, the alchemy of desire

...the brave one :)

you would have noticed that the really courageous ones never make a point the loudest; they don’t have all the solutions either and definitely not the one to win all arguments. infact they are the ones to remain silent and solemn till the very end, observing and taking it all and striking in when you expected the least, all very quietly.

ammi is no social genius, not a master degree holder or a world traveler, all the things that define the modern empowered women, but she has her own inner world where she lives freely with no demons from the past to be slayed, with a soft and pure heart, contended conscience, a very matter-of-fact persona, where practicality precedes maternal affection, imbibing confidence, with opinions not easy to change and a personality to reckon with!

in a society where lack of courage doesn’t amount to cowardice but collective conformity, i smile every single time i see her breaking all the rules, when i see her fighting silently, taking path-breaking stands, going against the norm, questioning the status-quo, sailing away from safe harbor and managing it all so well single handedly, oh! so adeptly - when everything else around seems to soak in medocrity and conventionality,  i am lifted above, every time catching a glimpse of a strength so natural that it’s hard to put in words

they said one man with courage is a majority; well a woman with courage is the only thing you need throughout your life…and all those people who gathered on a windy morning of december to pay their last respects to abbu knew he is leaving behind a woman of courage and grace, a legacy to cherish and i will be damned if i don’t lay my claim on that…today when i have moved away from my little life, evolved as an individual, formed relationships, travelled countries, progressed in career, created memories, relished experiences i realize i have a long long way to go to be as bold and courageous as ammi! if only i can have a fraction of what you own :) 

they said women can’t have it all, i advice, talk to ammi :)

thank you for being the rock in a storm. thank you for not giving up on us during times when we wanted to give up on ourselves. thank you for loving us with all our idiosyncrasies and all.

and thank you for staying strong, no matter what!
 - - - - -

i asked her once, if given a choice (considering she never got the opportunity to pursue high school) what profession would you have picked up?

and her very confident self said without a moment of hesitation,
“a barrister”

(not just any lower court lawyer or the very women-oriented teacher or the ever-so-noble doctor)

guess that pretty much sums it up!

its not mere co-incidence her name is derived from the name of a solitary bird which soars at a speed of 200mph with exceptional vision and a flight so magnificent full of pride and elegance, a falcon she is, flying high :) may Allah bless you with everything your heart desires :)

...who am i? who i am.

"i mean, who are you? you hate bloggers. you make fun of twitter. you don't even have a facebook page. you're the one who doesn't exist"

- sam(birdman 2014)

seriously, is this what it has boil down to? is the situation this bad, then yeah i am glad i dont exist!

...where the heart is :)

so the mandatory yearly trip to bombay happened (and how!)

the plan was me doing it all alone as the biker was extremely busy setting his company’s next five year business strategy, but i was dead sure he won’t survive four weeks all alone and this is what happened next

well, where do i begin...short takes will have to suffice

-  mere brother ki dulhan joined the family, chotu had a fabulous nikah and i now request all my muslim brothers and sisters to get married the way he did...such simplicity, no typical shenanigans, zero artificiality, brilliance personified with all the components of an ideal islamic marriage, he always wanted just two witnesses and that’s all it takes to seal the deal :)
-  they tell me marriages are made in heaven but it takes people like chotu and b3 (my cousins named her b3) to make it appear believable – issues, dramas, religion, controversies, tears, laughter, arguments, agreements, they had it all – i am glad chotu chose to stand by, he chose wisely
-  i have never met a talented girl like b3, who at this age is so clear about her priorities and principles, respect!
-  within 8hours moving from 4 degrees to 34 and you just fit in, you know you are home
-  finished reading rearview: my roadies journey, mc mary kom, i am abu salem, half girlfriend (the biker  got these books delivered to me, he decided that i need to read these, this boy!)
-  had two weeks of non-intrusive, 0% distraction, 100% blissful family time (with ammi), doing a whole lot of nothing until…
-  the biker came by at the end of two weeks and swept  me away on a flight to goa, next thing i know we checked-in a hotel right at the beach
-  waking up to the sound of waves
-  bombay-goa-panchgani-mahableshwar-panchgani-bombay happened
-  i am ten kgs heavier in four weeks and the biker 3 in 2!
paaya~seekh~masurpulav~koftacurry~palakpaneer~mutterpaneer~aaluparatha~chickenmanchurian~chickenchilli~jafferbhai’sbiryani~pudding~panipuri~50wadapav~
chai~paanikum~bhutta~strawberrycream~mackeral~lobster~surmai~fishcurry~crabs~schezwanfriedrice~eggcurry~kebab~phirni~
-  and i’m a phuppho yet once more - another niece joins the khan clan, good luck bhai
-  even the rickshaw waale bhai too tell me to have kids now :p
-  we met him again
-  chotu gave me ‘naeg’ (its gift from a bother to his sister on his wedding, traditionally cash or gold) - well, he gave me this, told you he is super cool :)
-  bade bhaiyya ensured that i had lots and lots of papaya, mooli, kacche amrud
-  meeting hums, alhumdulilah what a lovely gentleman he is turning into, may Allah bless him with everything his heart wishes for
-  met heavily loaded f1 and the first thing i said after seeing her “you look damn funny” and got disgusted looks from ammi and f1’s mom, what can i say, i could not resist
-  was home

nothing gives me more joy than being with my family, though i must admit that it has taken me some time to understand that these relationships are what matter most in the end…that ultimately, it's about people…people who matter, i don’t care a bit about relationships that didn’t work…i now hold no grudges for anyone...i just don’t give a damn, i smile i don’t care whether they smile back or not  - this very drop in an extremely inflated ego is a nice by-product of ageing i guess - dont get too excited, it is work in progress and i can be quite a fathead at times

so many memories, so many smiles, so much love…all spread across my home, home that grounds me, makes me me….i gather all of these up and become a whole, the best and the most of what i am and can ever be :)

everytime i come back, colleagues tell me “you guys should travel the world with the money and time you spent every year to visit family across the globe” how do i tell them that you are my world ammi, they don’t get it :)

sketch of mine listening to the waves, done by the biker:)

yeah...it was a good trip

no, a great trip, must do it again soon

2014 trip done, and its 2015 from tomorrow, just saying ;)

...i say thank you :)

"she seems so cool, so focused, so quiet, yet her eyes remain fixed upon the horizon. you think you know all there is to know about her immediately upon meeting her, but everything you think you know is wrong. passion flows through her like a river of blood. she only looked away for a moment, and the mask slipped, and you fell. all your tomorrows start here"

-neil gaiman, fragile things: short fictions and wonders

...waiting for my chance at redemption!

like us when you are married and living and breathing in the same space with only that one individual (with no in-laws to mediate and kids to distract) you fight, fight in complete earnest, passionately with bursting fury (but not malicious, never below the belt, never indulge in that rookie marriage mistake, you need to set boundaries, we have principles for uncivilzed behaviour too :p ), screaming, slamming doors, the usual last-time-you-said-this-but-the-first-time-that, we do it all 

and then one evening amidst all this drama going on, the argument favouring me, just inches away from sweet victory

out of nowhere

he calls me an angry bird,

seriously; an angry bird i mean of all the things angry bird!

such a bummer at calling names...and more importantly how am i then expected to continue fighting with a straight face!

the cheeky bugger whatsapped me this pic in next two secs!

he then pinged chotu saying "your sister is an angry bird" and that useless pest replied "haan haan woh red waali"

you own this round mate, bet the next one will be mine 

i will get even buddy, be scared, be very scared for the payback time

really, angry bird?!?

in the background my bose plays simon and garfunkel’s bridge over troubled waters, cant be just mere coincidence, right? just saying ;)

...time of the year (yet again!)

7.9.2014 ( 6:33 p.m.)

biker (looking dismissively at his iphone 5) : this phone *now* feels quite heavy, too bulky...its too thick yaar

i get it dude!

wish i could say more *hmph*

happiness is... (version 1.0)

- offering prayers, 5 times a day, on time, consistently over months…years

- working with a crazy team (the wolf of old broad street)

- sleeping after a grand breakfast at 11

- honesty and frankness

- taking afternoon naps shamelessly

- grease in my hands

- biker holding my hand when crossing the road

- setting up an out of office

- pronouncing croissant correctly

- carrying so many books from the library that my arm hurts

- being inspired, being an inspiration

- teaching

- chotu capturing bombay rains and sending over digitally

- seeing my three bros fussing over ammi

- experiencing humility

- being excited to come to office on a monday

- being called a goal digger

- twisting the throttle

- mango kulfi

- dirty trainers

- friday and grocery, house cleaning, movies

- washing the car with biker

- an old b-school mate’s random three word email

- right colour of gosht ka masala, perfect consistency of rice in biryani

- being made fun of in a whatsapp group of three (biker and chotu being the other two)

- knowing that trash song from 90’s and singing it loudly in the middle of oxford street

- finished the lowland, on the white mughals and ogling joseph anton on the book shelf

- being asked to serve gutthi to a biker's friend's new-born cos the grandparents want the kid to be like me

- talking to ambitious independent youngsters (as young as 18-20) with absolute clarity about their career path and on it already

~~~they tell me i can’t buy happiness, but they never said i can’t steal it :)

alhumdullilah

...finding a lost piece of yourself in someone else!

"a feeling…that there was in her life the absence of something, or someone fundamental to her existence. sometimes it was vague, like a message sent across shadowy byways and vast distances, a weak signal on a radio dial, remote, warbled. other times it felt so clear, this absence, so intimately close it made her heart lurch"

-khalid hosseini (and the mountains echoed)

what a beautiful narrative chemistry the man weaves, a bloody good storyteller, a story about existences which are both compromised and wasted, and yet lived!

...time'less!

are we really free…if we are what is freedom?

freedom is just to ‘be’ with no concept of time , just, to do what you want to do  and more importantly when you want to do, no o’clock for me :)

birthdays, time to change gears, time of the month, am:pm, probation, half time, 5 year plans, end of day/close of business task, news-hour, shutter speed, world cup, anniversaries, time-table, showtime, maturity date, notice period, 8.06 a.m. bus, retirement, 450degrees pre-heated oven, warranty period, gmt-bst-ist, time-out, doc’s appointment, dinner time, appraisal time, calendar entry, biological clock, 2-minute noodle, d-day, countdowns, arrivals-departure, 9to5, timeanddate.com, 5k in 15, 7day gm diet, deadline, lifetime, best of the times, a life dictated by outlook/lotus notes calendar

high time

about-effing-time

we take it easy simply take it as it comes, plain revolt against time…there are no stars on the perimeter…there is no normal…what is normal to the spider is chaos to the fly…i love anything to do about disorder, revolt, chaos, stuff which makes no sense, co-incidences, exceptions, nothing to lose - nothing to gain, simply ethereal - ultimate road to freedom

i am sure that once upon a time there was no time, a time 'before' the beginning - the time of my life

death, there is no set time, an appointment we all have to keep, is truly seductive

we can start a religion here, as there is no time, i made that all up ;)

do i make sense to you? no!!! oh you lesser mortals...only a genius like einstein can help me with such things, he said it, 'time is an illusion' amen!